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MICRO CHEATING

Sort of like cheating.

But not really.

WTF is MicroCheating, anyway? Defined expertly and vaguely by a sexy doctor in Australia, microcheating is basically doing things that if you’re significant other found out about, you’d start sweating. And deleting all your apps.

Read on for the most common offensives of microcheating below. Is it happening to you? Or worse - are you doing it?

THE AUNT SUZY

Even if you’re not actually locking lips and dropping skivvies, changing someone’s name in your phone is not a good sign in any relationship. If you wouldn’t want your bf/gf seeing that you are texting this person, ask yourself : why not? Hiding communication is unnecessary + stressful. Stress = not sexy. If you want to talk to that person, maybe the next chat you have to have is with the guy in your bed.

THE FAME GAME

Many gals understand a certain degree of social media praise - for example: Gigi Hadid posts a hot pic. Of course, your boyfriend liked it. But also, so did you. Celebs are celebs. I will be rolling in my grave before the day that my BF gets a chance with a Hadid - and if I’m wrong, then I can relish in that I dated the guy that dates Gigi Hadid. Problem solved.

SNAPCHAT. JUST THE WHOLE THING.

Back in the day *like, 2017* you could see your boyfriend’s top 5 best friends on platform (not that we were looking, or anything…) Since then, this feature has been removed. Alas, we have had to retreat to actually *trusting* our partner to keep his snap out of his pants - and since then, we have had peace of mind. And pretty filters.

I LIKE IT LIKE THAT

Ok, so he “liked” his coworker’s Instagram pic, who just happens to be single and a SoulCycle instructor with huge tits on the Upper West Side - so what? Everyone has friends - it would be weirder if your S/O didn’t know any girls at work - wouldn’t it? Fast forward a few hours. Like. Like. Like. Maybe even a reply to an Instagram Story of her and her dog cuddling on the couch watching Bachelorette. Is this “so what?” Or “so shady?” You decide.

CEOs + OFFICE HOES

There’s nothing like the thrill of pouring yourself a cup of coffee in a mediocre corner at work, hoping that your cubicle crush needs a cup at the same time. Of course, you would have worn mascara anyway, but we both know the lipstick (and the lace underthings) are extra. What’s the harm in a little work-on-work flirtation?

Nothing, some say.

A line of tape across the living room, say others.

Where do you stand on microcheating? Myth, or IRL relationship ruiner? Comments section is all yours xo